Al and Lori Elmore have been married for more than three decades and describe themselves as “happily incompatible.”
Their enthusiasm for healthy relationships is evident in the marriage classes and retreats they’ve led over the years, which took an exciting turn when they were introduced to the Different By Design (DBD) curriculum.
The Elmores first learned about DBD at a marriage retreat in 2011 with Rodney and Beth Cox. Since Al is a pastor, he decided to attend the 2012 Ministry Insights Equipping Conference to learn further about DBD and Leading From Your Strengths (LFYS). Al and Lori attended the conference again in 2017, this time together.
Then they incorporated the DBD material into a weekend retreat for 28 couples in Ohio’s Amish country, sponsored by Lima Baptist Temple, their home church. Participants registered through the church website and received a confirmation email with their Marriage Insights passcodes so they could have their profiles completed for the weekend.
“DBD helps couples to discover and value their strengths and differences and to develop oneness with each other and God,” says Lori. “The marriage retreat and DBD were a useful springboard to help couples communicate better and understand each other.”
Breakthrough Truth: “I Don’t Need to Change My Spouse!”
That springboard in a beautiful autumn setting created a powerful environment for marriage breakthroughs at the retreat.
“We don’t need to change each other!” That was a big discovery for Bob and Michelle. Prior to the retreat they were aware that they had differences, but the profiles gave them a clarity as to the strengths each brings to their relationship. Both husband and wife came away motivated to value the strengths in their spouse.
“The most important thing I learned at the marriage retreat is that 1 + 1 = 1,” says Michelle. “I want to work very hard to make sure Bob knows how much I love him and how important he is to me.”
That contagious enthusiasm also impacted Joe and Susan. They had been in marriage counseling before the retreat, admitting they felt isolated from each other and focused on their children. During counseling, they had completed the profiles and were aware of each other’s strengths but had not put the data to use. But it was during the retreat that they were inspired to take a step forward.
“Before digging into DBD, we recognized that we were very different from one another,” Joe and Susan shared. “But now, we want to work on understanding our differences and appreciate the strengths in each other so we can be united as one.”
Breakthroughs Begin with You
In addition to DBD and the Marriage Insights profile, Al has used the Leading From Your Strengths process with his staff. “The profile helps you understand why people act a certain way or handle responsibilities a certain way,” says Al. That’s a big reason he recommends the entire Ministry Insights suite for work teams, employers, coaches, and counselors who lead staffs, counsel couples, or speak at retreats and conferences.
Both Al and Lori stress how firsthand experience with Different By Design and the Marriage Insights profile gave them the foundation to lead others to marriage breakthroughs.
“DBD is a great tool to help you and your spouse understand and affirm each other,” says Al. “Do it yourself and you’ll see.”
Special Offer – Limited Time: Different By Design Curriculum 45% Off Through February 28
As a special offer to our readers and as a way to encourage couples in their marriages, we’re offering 45% off the Different By Design bundle now through February 28. The bundle (regular price $64.95) includes the Different By Design DVD, 2 workbooks (1 for each spouse) and 2 Marriage Insights profiles (1 for each spouse). Order your bundle here.
More about Building Marriages
Marriage: Counselor Jimmy McLeod Invests in Marriages and Teams With Profiles
Marriage: Financial Advisor Uses Universal Message to Build Marriages
Marriage: Love & Money – and Interview with Rodney Cox and Don Blanton